February 5, 2009
Marriage
I’m married. Wow. That’s something I never thought I’d be.
I was never a big fan of marriage, and I’m not saying I am now. But I love the idea that it’s something new, it’s something you have to experience on your own, and nobody is really an expert on it.
My husband has been my boyfriend for the past 9 years. Imagine that. You’d think there’s nothing more we don’t know about each other. Truth is, there’s been a lot of surprises.
And though I’m not yet in the position to complain ‘coz I’m not, there’s still this one notion I have with marriage that hasn’t changed. It is a decision I have to make everyday. And boy, does my resolve weaken sometimes. But then there are days when it has never been stronger.
So I say yes, marriage is a lot of things. And this will not be the fist time I’ll be writing about it. I’m still discovering the magnitude of its power.
‘Till next time.
September 15, 2008
Blessed
There is not much I regret in my life, EXCEPT perhaps for eating too much chocolate.
Not because I’ve always chosen right, but because when I chose wrong, I found the courage to make things right. I never looked back and wondered what might have been. I’ve always believed that it’s not the choices you make in your life but the life you live after the choices you make that defines your life.
I don’t regret saying yes to all my exes. I don’t regret loving with all my heart — and for perhaps too long than I should have. I don’t regret ending my relationships and experiencing the pain after the breakup. I don’t regret having loved and left. I don’t regret having loved and lost.
I don’t regret having been carefree and foolish at 26. I don’t regret following the motto “Come what may” at 27. I don’t regret not wanting to get married even at 28. I was a devil-may-care kind. I might have saved myself a lot of pain by having become wiser earlier. But wisdom is a work in progress. And just when you think you know everything, you realize you know nothing.
Don’t get me wrong though, my life has not been perfect. It hasn’t been easy. I too, struggle with the demons daily. It’s not that I’ve always been happy. You just can’t be. It’s not that I’m never scared. As a matter of fact, I often am. And contrary to popular belief, It’s not that I have always been brave and strong. I just have a very big God. And He loves me, more than I could ever understand. So I guess thanks to Him and all His grace, I’m not the regretful kind. He always made sure I understood the reason why it happened, and why He chose me for it.
And for that I consider myself…yes, blessed.
May 30, 2008
Insecure
